To read:

(Finally finish) Joseph Heller's Catch-22
Anthony Burgess's A Clockwork Orange
Robert Stone's Dog Soldiers
Thomas Pynchon's Gravity's Rainbow (700 pages full of digression, over 300 characters... I'll start that next summer ._.)
William Gibson's Neuromancer
John le Carre's The Spy Who Came in From the Cold (I love thrillers :D)
Thomas Friedman's The World is Flat
Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged

I can't think of any more, these were all books I just randomly put on my black berry for whatever reason, so I'll make a trip to Borders, if it's still there, and purchase some of them (books can be really expensive...)

Albums:

I want to start buying albums and collect them and use them on my pretty swell cd player thing in my room :D



Jay-Z's American Gangster. Apparently Obama admitted that this was one of his favorites. I like a lot of his tracks on this, shows how lyrically smooth he can be while still showing he's got that edge that separates Jay-Z from some shitty Kanye West or other maintstream rapper. I really want to see the movie now... I shall find a way to buy this once I can find my debit card....



John Legend's Evolver. I really need to get around buying this dude's album. None of his tracks are like, filler bullshit. They all seem to have a story to tell, and I personally think it's a pretty swell album by a swell artist. Must find the debit card and buy this too...


And Let My Materialism Begin....

My phone's contract is about to expire, so it's about time to say peace to my rather outdated Blackberry Pearl. I really want another blackberry; the interface and simplicity of all the blackberries really separates itself from other phones. I'll just wait until I'm a senior though. Until then I'm going to spend 300 dollars on...

 

32 Gig iPod Touch. My 8 gig pretty much died; it's screen is cracked, the jack is messed up so music quality is absolute shit, and it's somehow outdated by three models in like, two years. It's also completely full and I need more space. So, I'll do my best to not kill it.



Lacoste Essential: I WAS THE FIRST PERSON IN MY GRADE TO USE THIS. kthxbai. Anyways I really like the scent of this, and so does everyone else. I'm sick of the dolce gabanna Light Blue, and yeah...

Fitted hats, and hats, and more hats. Yeah.
Calvin Klein Jeans and boxer briefs!

Do I have the money for all these? No... which means... time to start saving up grrr.

kajsdflkjadsf I'm bored! lol soo today i finally worked out for once, and holy shit I'm sore as hell. Working out with dorian and andrew lee is intense shit, and also funny as hell, considering andrew is like the biggest goofball I've ever met in my life... It occupies my mind for once so it's pretty satisfying to successfully hit the gym. T_T  I realized I gained like five pounds of fat, and frankly, I despise all the extra luggage. So I'm trying to get back into shape hahaha

i officially give up on school. I really don't care anymore about my grades... Rutgers '16 babyyyy =D


my recent... well not really but anyways my problems have really been put into perspective as of late. My grandpa has lung cancer and is going to die. Apparently he doesn't want to be in the hospital because he gets lonely at night and scared =[ but he has to, and he can't even use the bathroom by himself. My dad was devastated, and it was mad awkward seeing him cry, since he's the one that always told me never to cry. He's really into family relations, and he regrets going to America a lot, and not spending time with his parents. I guess considering we don't have any close cousins nor does he have any true friends here in America it's pretty depressing. Dealing with that, driving all the way to new york every day, dealing with my bullshit, dealing with my moms outrageous ignorance and obnoxiousness (is that even a word?), trying to make money in a small business in this shitty economy, shit, props to him. It's a shame I'll never have a conversation with my grandpa as I can't speak Korean. and that sort of actually bothers me.

Life's too short for me to be all down like this so I'm trying mad hard to bring everything back the way it used to be, so that I can be happy. I know my mistakes, my flaws, and how stupid I can be, but dammmmn I've been dwelling on that way too long.  I explored every possible outlet for it, and I guess best one is just... idk lmao fail ahhh. People tell me I'm too hard on myself and I'm starting admit I guess I am. When I don't give a shit, I really don't, but for those rare things that I really care about, holy shit I'm one of the most stubborn people you'll ever meet. :P OH and i found a fortune cookie thingy that says "your happiness is intertwined with your outlook on life". Definitely  going to keep that in mind.

On the random note, I think I'm starting to grow a taste for classical music. fml

until then...